Is it Friday yet?

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Did you ever have to work with someone you absolutely cannot stand?

Ok, let me rephrase. You know what it’s like to work with someone you absolutely can’t stand?

That’s me right now.

One of my coworkers is making me nuts. I take some comfort in knowing that a few of my other coworkers also find her irritating. She’s one of those fussy, prudish, up-tight women who don’t get it when someone makes a joke, and heaven forbid anyone mentions something she finds inappropriate. She feels the need to criticize my clothing choices, but her wardrobe looks like something out of a 90’s mail-order catalog. She talks down to a few of us, especially when we’re not living up to her shining example of professionalism. She has some kind of perverse need to be the only one our boss relies on, and defends his bad behavior like a battered wife. She is always the first to complain about workload, but is too much of a control freak to delegate, and would never tell the boss she can’t take on anything more. She makes herself out to be a martyr (“I have so many meetings I can’t get anything done!”, “I wake up before dawn to get the bus and then I don’t get home until 9!”) and makes me feel like leaving at 5 is morally wrong. She’ll send emails with phrases like “Just a friendly reminder, but I’ve already completed X, Y and Z…” or “I find it helpful to color-code my files and Mr. Boss appreciates when I do…” It’s so condescending.  

I think part of the problem is that she reminds me of every full-of-herself, holier-than-thou, teacher’s pet, tattle-tale girl who made me feel insignificant in High school. She thinks it’s a competition, when really we’re all on the same side.

If anyone out there is reading this, how do you handle people who make you want to scream?

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Finding My Way

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It’s been a long time since I’ve kept a journal, so please forgive me if I ramble or abbreviate too much.

I’ve had depression since puberty, and it got much worse in college. After being diagnosed with PCOS (PolyCystic Ovary Syndrome), I started various medications and things improved. In the last 10 years, there have been many changes and many ups and downs. I was in therapy for a couple of years. Lately I’ve been feeling overwhelmed by everything, so I started therapy again. I’m going to be seeing a psychiatrist too, to get my meds in balance, which will hopefully make some difference. In the meantime, I’m exceptionally grateful to have a supportive husband who does everything he can to try to make the load lighter.

So I thought maybe writing my thoughts down could help me to make sense of what’s causing this episode, or help me to cope.

Let’s see how it goes.